Tuesday, December 7, 2010

The Day I Almost Turned Vegetarian

Have you ever been to Cafe Rio? Well...apparently, they've got good food. I read many blogs that just rave about it. Somehow I came across this recipe for Cafe Rio's pork roast. Now...let me tell you - I don't really eat....Pork. Yes, I like bacon on Sunday mornings, but...that's about it. Somehow as I was reading the recipe...I was imagining a normal roast, not a pork roast. So, yesterday as I was planning my weekly meals and preparing to go grocery shopping, I came across that recipe. Something new...I thought. I jotted down the couple things I needed and headed to the store.

Wait. Let me back up a bit. I've got this weird food aversion. I don't eat meat on bones. It's weird, I know. Chicken wings? Like the flavor...need a fork and knife please. I've come a long way...I used to not even be able to even touch them. I still really can't But, at least I can have a bite using a fork and knife. I really like to pretend that the protein (meat) that I eat isn't even an animal. It's not an animal rights thing...it's a mental thing. I like my protein to look as processed as possible. I've never been to a Hawaiian luau...but, I'm guessing I wouldn't be near the pig roast. GROSS! When I make chicken or tacos or a pot roast...it's boneless/skinless and I pretty much wash my hands about 75 times throughout the process. It's seriously nauseating.

Okay...so back to the pork roast. I make my list and head to the grocery store. I load my cart up with all the essentials for the week. Last on the list, pork roast. As I'm standing at the meat section, I look at my grocery list. Pork roast...it reads in almost illegible scribble. Just then, at that very moment, I realize that I am making PORK not pot roast.

Pork? What? Yuck!!?? Those are all the things that are going through my mind. And...I'm also thinking about how the Hottie loves pork chops (my mom makes them for him). I'm debating whether or not to proceed. I walk over to the pork section. Pork loin. Pork picnic roast. Pork shoulder. What? I have no idea what to buy. I look for an employee. Meat department has gone home for the night. So...I call my mom. Luckily, she guides me through the best she can over the phone. I select the smallest looking pork roast that I can find and head to the checkout. Holy crap - pork roast is expensive. Definitely not doing this again unless I've got a major coupon.

So this morning...I get out the ingredients for the Cafe Rio pork roast recipe. I cut open the bag of pork roast. OMG! There is a bone.

Yes. My pork roast has a bone. What? Seriously? YUCK! Right then and there I seriously debate tossing the whole thing and turning vegetarian. Vege quesadillas are calling my name. But, I can't stop thinking about my expensive pork roast and the fact that the Hottie loves Chipotle carnitas.

So...I did what I had to do. I transfer the pork roast from the bag to the crock pot in no more than 5 seconds. Then...I scrub, scrub, scrub my hands for a good 4 minutes. I then mix up the rest of the ingredients and pour it in. Low for a loooooong time, 7-ish hours.

So, how did it taste? It was good. But, to be honest - it was the very first pork roast that I've ever knowingly had. So...there is no comparison. The hottie loved it, so that's all that really matters.

Luckily...the Hottie was on clean-up duty. Umm...you should have seen the bone. Had I seen that this morning...I would definitely have become a vegetarian. It was almost enough to change the hottie.

Now that I've made everyone completely disgusted...I will share the recipe. It is good. I promise. My bone phobia is really my own mental illness.

Cafe Rio Pork Roast
2 lb pork roast (I have no idea how large my roast was)
2 cans tomato sauce
2 tsp pressed garlic clove
1 1/2 cup brown sugar (I used light brown)
2 tsp cumin
2 cups Root beer
2 tbsp molasses
1/4 tsp salt and pepper to taste

Place pot roast in crock pot. Mix rest of ingredients together in a bowl and pour over pork roast. Cook on low for 7-9 hours. Shred to use.

We turned the pork roast into Chipotle style burritos (even though I don't like Chipotle). I even made cilantro-lime rice. The hottie says it's identical to Chipotle. So...here ya go:

Cilantro-lime rice
2 tbsp butter
1 1/4 cup rice
2 1/4 cup chicken broth
3/4 salt
pepper to taste
juice and zest of 2 small limes
2 tbsp chopped cilantro
1/4 tsp cumin

In a skillet melt butter with rice, add liquid and other ingredients. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat. Cover and cook for 20 minutes.

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