When I began my career...it was really supposed to be temporary. I was still in school (go ASU!!) and was also working as an intern for an adoption agency. I began in the call center and received my Property & Casualty license to sell insurance. Well...I got married, graduated college, and...well...I guess Social Work doesn't really pay and I ended up staying at Progressive. It's funny how you sometimes expect to do one thing...and then do something completely different. That is what happened here.
I've moved around a bit...call center, claims, training, and now...instructional design.
I have been in training for 5 years. I love it. In training, I have worked closely with some designers and that design piece always fascinated me. Well...some positions opened a few months ago and...low and behold...I got one! The plan was for me to finish my training work...go on maternity leave...and return to the new job. And, that is exactly what happened. It was a very smooth transition.
I started back at work at the beginning of August. Since then...I have been working my little (well...not really little, but you know what I mean) tushy off to learn about my new job. You see...I am definitely NOT a designer genius. Far from it. I'm pretty much a designer infant. I know very little. I knew that ahead of time...but, now that I'm in the job...I realize that I am pretty much clueless.
I like that. Well...sort of. I love the challenge. I love to be busy. I love learning new things. I love learning new programs. I love getting ideas from other designers. I love meeting new people and building another set of skills. I love my new team and my new boss. I love the creativity. Basically, I love everything....well almost.
I love everything...everything BUT how ridiculously stupid I feel. You see, this new job has a completely different set of needed skills. There is definitely a learning curve. A very looooooooong learning curve. And, I am at the very beginning. I'm moving at the pace of a snail. Yes, I love the learning aspect...and the new skills...and the new programs...and the creativity...but, I pretty much know absolutely nothing. Well, nothing about the building of the training. I can outline it, piece it together, and pretty much lay it out like an expert...but, when it comes to the building of it...I'm lost. Luckily, I have a great mentor (my boss). I've worked with him on projects before...and he's great. I have a couple other people in my building that are great "go-to" peeps for questions, too.
The thing is...I'm not very good at being this person. Meaning...I'm not good at being the person that doesn't know anything. I don't like being the person that asks questions all the time...the person that is brand spankin' new...the person that is lost and embarrassed to be lost. I LOVE being the person that helps those lost, confused, struggling people out.
Ugh!! Call it the perfectionist complex...but, I SO hate not knowing anything!
3 comments:
Dawn:
Obvioulsy, if you got this job someone sees the wonderful skills that you have to offer in a new position. Be patient with yourself, it takes 6-12 months to really be comfortable in a new job. You will do a great job. It's okay to not have all of the answers.
Dawn, you took the words out of my mouth EXACTLY!!! I could literally cut and paste this (minus the maternity leave part) and it would be my feelings exactly!!! You're not alone, we can just feel like idiots and get frustrated together :)
Dont worry about it sweetie. In no time you will have this down and rocking it.
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